Discussion in 'General Discussions and Lounge' started by Jade, Sep 17, 2015.
What's something that's not horrible but you can't tell your Significant other.
Probably something to do with my body. Personal things that are going on. Even though we've been together for 9 years, there are some things you just don't tell your SO because they're embarrassing or they won't see you as sexy. And they don't want to hear about it anyway! Sometimes you need to try and keep the relationship fresh! Haha!
I've always wanted to be a philosopher poet. It's quite embarrassing saying it out loud not only to my SO but close friends and family as well that's why I keep it a secret. It's not something that will make me rich and it's just the right amount of magnanimity that'll make me sound like a douche. LOL but it's a dream right?
I cant tell her that I am not really awesome.
I can't tell him that I am really afraid to lose him because I don't want him to think he could take advantage of me.
Keeping secrets about the past is never a good idea as they will always get found out and that could cause a trust issue. Keeping small things about your future though, and where you want a relationship to go are sometimes best kept to yourself as you'll never be certain if they'll feel the same.
In that case your best bet is to try and get an idea of what they might want and see if it's similar to what your thinking. Sometimes saying or demanding something can back others in to a corner and under pressure, they might not give you the answer you want to hear.
I tell my SO everything. We've been together for so long, and he really is my BFF. I don't think there is anything that I haven't told him. We've been together for 15 years and we've been married for 11. I can't hide anything from him because we know each other too well. He would know if I was hiding something, just like I would know if he was.
To be honest I can't imagine what its like to be with a person for 15 years, but all the best to you both @nailah783 one question though, do you have to work at it as hard as you do at the beginning of the relationship, or are you that used to each other now that it just comes naturally?
You are constantly working on your relationship, but there comes a certain comfort ability in knowing a person and being completely yourself with that person. I feel like when you're first starting a relationship, there's so much that you don't show that person, so I completely understand the question, but with us being together for so long, it would be difficult to hide anything.
@nailah783 I understand were your coming from but is there not the risk of being too comfortable with each other, if that makes sense? The magic or excitement dissapears after a while I think if your not careful, and then it becomes clear if your meant to be together or not.
You can get too comfortable too soon and then there can be a problem. A relationship should not be all work all the time. It's not a job, and you're not getting paid for it. Infatuation fades, but it's supposed to. You have to be realistic. That feeling that you get in the beginning of a relationship will not be there forever. This is real life, it's not the movies. Love evolves. I am so in love with my husband, but it's not the same as when we first met. When we first met, I could barely speak i front of him because I was all giddy all of the time. Things change, and it's about how you change with them. Once the magic and excitement is gone, you're right, that's when you notice if you were meant to be or not. Just because there is no more magic like the beginning does not mean there isn't still a spark there. The spark is what you need to nurture. You can't get complacent in your relationship, but you can get comfortable for the rest of the ride.
This hit me hard.
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